Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Confessions of a Cook in the Kitchen

Everyone has a secret or two, don't you agree? The problem may not be in the secret itself but in the fact you forgot you never confessed the secret until...oh....about twenty-eight years later.

Let me start off by giving you a little background to the truth: When my husband and I first started dating I wanted to impress him with my home cooking. Because we all know the way to a man's heart is through food.....yea, whatever. Oh, I could cook a few things at that time in my life, but I quickly ran out of ideas on cooking great dishes that were not repeats. Unfortunately for me, I did not grow up with the convenience of internet to search recipes online. No, I had to search my brain for friends who could cook great dishes and ask them how or would they make it. Yes, I so did that.

Now, my best friend's mother made some of my favorite dishes. One of my favorites was her lasagna. Oh, she made the best lasagna. So one day, I shamefully called her up and asked her if I purchased all the ingredients for her lasagna, would she make it for me. She quickly offered to give me the recipe (which she did and I still make it today) but I was afraid I'd mess it up since I had never made it before. I explained that to her and I remember she just laughed but agreed to make it. It was a huge relief. Seriously.

So the day my then boyfriend/now husband was coming over for dinner, I dropped all the ingredients off at my friend's house before I went to work, and picked it up on my way home. If I tell you that I flew like the wind to get home so I could pop that pan of lasagna in the oven (so it would appear I had cooked it) would you believe me?? Wait...don't answer that! The results however, were exactly what I wanted...he loved the lasagna, and I assume, he thought I was a magnificent cook with that meal and some of the other things I felt confident in cooking...he married me after all ;-)

I am sure you are wondering if I felt bad for that little indiscretion and letting him assume I had made that dinner. I really did not, no sire. I mean after all, I did learn to make that wonderful lasagna myself, and well, no harm was done.I had forgotten that little secret of mine from long ago until a one night this weekend.

My daughter wanted to do something nice for a boyfriend who lives out of town. She very cleverly got him to confess to her what his favorite cookies were and she made a plan to make some and send them to him in the mail as a surprise. They were well received and he loved them. He loved them so much that he told my daughter that they were much better than the cookies his very own mother made him.

He told her that his mothers cookies sometimes tended to by dry..and hers were perfect and wonderful. Now, that would be the conclusion to a happy ending, all except for one small little problem. He assumed my daughter had made those cookies from scratch and he thought they were better than his own mothers...and the fact of the matter was she purchased the cookie dough at the store. Ahem.

I am here to report that my daughter, just like her mother, did not say anything to her friend. She did not confess about the cookies.....but after about three weeks of him bringing the subject up, she decided enough was enough. She could not, with a clear conscience hear him say how great she was and how wonderful she was in making him those cookies, and how great they tasted one more time. She had stood all she could stand and one night she replied..."yea....about that"....and she came clean.

She told him that she had purchased the cookie dough from the store and they were not made from scratch...not really homemade. Luckily, he did not care about that and was more concerned with the sweet gesture made by my daughter. Her conscience bothered her in the fact he assumed she had made them from scratch....She is so unlike her mother!

Last week as my husband and I were talking over dinner, I had told him about her and the cookies. He laughed, but really did not pay me too much attention as he was in the middle of enjoying his grilled steak and potatoes. I continued on with my story and compared it to when I served him lasagna long ago before we were married and how I had not even made it.

There sat my husband, with his fork stabbed into a piece of steak suspended in mid air, just mere inches from his mouth and he stopped mid stream, tilted his head to the side and asked, "What did you say???" 

 I threw my head up from looking at my own plate and when I looked at him I knew right away this was clearly news to him. Likewise,what do you say when you have let the cat and the kittens out of the bag with your big mouth. I guess I thought I had told him that little story earlier in our marriage. Nope. Clearly it was a surprise.

He did not say it, but I know he secretly thanked his lucky stars that our daughter could not keep a secret like that for twenty-eight years. In fact, she could not keep it three weeks.

Moral of this story: Always raise your kids to be better than you consider yourself to be and if you have something to confess....just tell it and get it over with, because you will get to a point you won't remember if they know the truth or not and telling on yourself is not always how you want the story to end! Luckily, I learned to cook rather well even if I started out rather slow and a little dishonest!


  1. Oh, Suzanne, this is too funny. I have done similar things, but to this day try hard and not slip up and tell on myself. The visual you created about you and your hubby's conversation had me laughing out loud. Oh. To be a fly on the wall!

  2. Hysterical! I needed a good laugh.

  3. I would have never told the truth! I laughed out loud!

  4. I have to be honest. if I had thought of doing that, I probably would have. My mother was not a good cook so there wasn't much I wanted to learn from her. I don't know if I could have kept it a secret this long. Like your daughter, I would have spilled the beans.

  5. That's hilarious! When I got married, I had no idea how to cook either! I was always calling the older ladies in my church asking them how to make stuff, even stopped at one ladies house on my way home to ask her how to cook the chicken I just bought! LOL

  6. so funny.. I love this story.. my family all know I cannot cook! The 2 choices in our house were always .. take it or leave it and cook yourself! My kids can both cook x .. so need for me to do it !! lol x


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