Selling a house is hard work.....selling a house when you have never sold one before is even harder. This journey has been one that I could have never believed possible. The ups and downs, the excitement and disappointment has been paramount to any thing I have experienced in my life thus far. I had no idea this journey would take the paths that it did. That being said, we have finally made it to the point we are almost to closing day.....in seven days.
I tend to jot my feelings down when my heart is heavy or not settled, and as you can imagine that is what brought me here today. Almost thirty two years ago, I fell in love with a man who owned a rather sparsely decorated bachelor pad on the east side of Ft. Worth. A small two bedroom house, built in the 1940's which had no updates, just the basics. The stand out decor included red carpet, bark-cloth curtains (which were dubs "thanksgiving day" curtains) a set of old salon style swing doors that separated the kitchen from the dining room and yellow Formica counter tops in the kitchen. It had a great size yard, with lots of trees but not much grass and not a flower one. It needed a little help, but once we were married, the little house on the east side of Ft. Worth transformed and grew to accommodate our family. It has always been home, a safe landing place from the world.
I think about the renovations we have done on this house over the years. When I step back and see every thing we have done here, I can't help but see a little bit of ourselves in all the renovations. It has been a evolution over time to get that little house where it is today. I hope the new owners love it as much as I do. It was a process and one that included a lot of love and attention over the years.
I decided to count down the last seven days of this journey, and remind myself of all the things I love the most about the house we are leaving. As I think about the things I will miss the most, it is a reminder of all the things I have loved about our house over the years. Recollections, reminders, memories. Today I am reminded that a house is really just the shelter for a family. The family is the home of that shelter. However, there have been times in my life that this very house was my safe place in the world. In the big scheme of things, and only briefly, the darkest days of my life happened while living here, and this little house on the east side of Fort Worth was my safe haven from the world. When things were hard to handle and deal with, I was always felt safe and secure inside the walls of this house. Even now, when things are so good in this life, it is behind that front door and inside the walls that bring me the most piece and comfort on a day to day basis. This house has been the shelter from all storms life as bestowed upon me. It is the memories that sustain us and we will carry as we leave.
A lady made the statement to me that I have not detached myself from the house and I am still very emotionally attached. No truer words have been spoken. It is so bittersweet to be looking forward to what is to come, but knowing how hard it will be to let all I have loved for so long slip away and ready my heart to grasp the next chapter of our lives.
In seven days....the little house on the east side of Fort Worth won't have my our names on it any more......the shelter that has weathered the storms of life and provided a safe place to land will be that same thing for a new family. I will miss my safe haven from the world, the walls that have held me close and kept me from feeling so lost when things were hard. I will miss all the projects we worked on over the years that make our home a place we enjoyed as our lived happened year after year.
We are almost to the door that will open to the next chapter of our lives, a new chapter and a new home we can put our stamp on. It too will be a safe haven from the world, even if it is hard to imagine how that will be, just yet. I find it difficult to imagine grasping the door handle to the new house when my hand is tightly holding on to the old one still in my heart....thankfully...I still have seven days!
SPRINGTIME ON THE MANTEL
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