Hello friends, this post is to serve as a warning about opening text messages in public places. To do so, could result in having to explain yourself, and then botching it up in a ridiculous way. Doing so, could also annoy others when you don't really know enough about your phone to turn the message off or worse, when you think it is just a text and not one that is equipped with sound....very loud sound in fact when you are in a space of waiting patients in a doctors office.
This is a true story....it is not meant to offend anyone....it happened, and I hope I remember to wait until I am in the car if I am ever in a public place again to open a text message......just sayin'
Last week, I had a doctors appointment for a mammogram. Sorry if there are any guys that have found their way here today, you may want to click off now, or if your curiosity has gotten the better of you...well, you have been warned. Anyway, it was as always, hurry up, get there and wait. Once I was called back, the not so nice lady, (think old fashion school matron type) proceeded to order me to go change, put on the top...blah, blah, blah. And you guessed it, wait again. And for the life of me, I always wonder why in the devil it is always freezing in that place....hello......sub zero degrees is really not necessary.
There were benches outside the room where the mammogram is done, and I was waiting there rather impatiently with two other ladies about my age....40ish give or take a few.....anyway, my phone beeped...I had a text message. I thought it might be one of my kids...but it was from a friend.
So what do I do? Open it right there in the hallway that was so silent you could hear a pin drop to read it. Actually, I was rather happy for the message...anything was better than staring at two other ladies robed in a half gown knowing they were bare chested like myself....seriously.....
See that sweet little message...that is what was on my phone when I opened the message...I smiled thinking about my friend who sent it, and THEN it went off like a cannon.....click the arrow to hear the message!!!
One of the ladies looked up and asked me: "Is it your anniversary? How sweet of your husband to send you that!"
Me: Huh??? Oh, no....it is from my girlfriend.....I love that girl.....
Lady: "Oh, I see..." with raised and knowing eyebrows... (why at that moment did I feel her glance at my chest??)
Me: Puzzled then realizing what she thought...good grief, she thinks I like women......I exclaimed, "Oh, no...I'm married......"
Lady: raises eyebrows even more and opens a magazine......sorta smirking....
Me: ...."To a man.....my husband that is,.....this message is from my friend...who happens to be a girl....."
Guess you notice I was digging a deeper hole with trying to explain.....and really, why did she think it was any of her business and why did I feel the need to explain myself.....just because I said I got a message from my girlfriend.....did that mean I liked girls??? I find that today, so many people seem to be jumping to conclusions over the silliest things, but jump they do.
And wouldn't you know it about that time I glance up and the old school matron looking lady is standing in the doorway looking agitated and like she did not believe my story for one bit. Who's name do you think she called? Mine.....
All I could do is stand up, throw my shoulders back and say as I passed her standing in the doorway, "lets get these boobs picture taken ...I have things to do today"....and with that, I heard a loud gasp as I left the lady waiting on the bench and walked inside. But heck, if all those eyes wanted to look up behind open magazines and look and gawk, I was in the sorta mood to give them something to gawk at.....and I guess I did....I mean I had the nerve to say..."boobs" at a mammogram clinic of all places. And that school matron looking lady, seemed to find great pleasure in turning that crank a little tighter that day....but I swear, I did not flinch one bit.
So if you would like to save yourself the humiliation of having possibly to explain a text message with sound attached, I strongly advise not opening it in the doctor's office...or at the very least the mammogram clinic...but to my sweet friend who sent it, I meant what I said when I text back to you, "I love you more." I bet you could not have imagined the predicament that message would find me in.
Have a great weekend everyone...and if you have not had a mammogram this year, schedule yourself one, but leave your phone in the car.
I'd like to say Thank you to Alisha's friend, Brad who turned this text message into a video.....I could not figure out how to do it!!
Care to join me for some rattlesnake wrangling?
7 hours ago