Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Take Me Back Tuesday: The Road Traveled

Finding your place in this world and being relatively happy where ever that place may be is often not as easy as it should be. My mind has wondered about that very thing over the past few weeks.

As an adult I sometimes question the road that I have traveled to this spot on my road map. I lately often wonder if I missed an important detour or ignored warning signs along the way that would have lead me on a different path. How do you know for sure you are where you were meant to be when so many questions come to mind?

As a child growing into young adulthood we have dreams and hopes. One wrong road leaves us on a trail that most likely we wished we would have never traveled at one point or another. Some folks I know have the capability of recognizing what the wrong move was and move on to greater things via a different route. I seriously know someone who has that unbelievable insight and they never cease to amaze me. They stumble and like a cat, always end up on their feet. It is amazing. It is admirable. On the other hand, there are some that take the wrong path and just continue keeping on keeping on.....never really knowing how to pull onto the right road or make the right decisions to get them to the place they want to be.

These are two extremes I know, but I often wonder where I fit into this scenario because I know I am not one to always land on my feet and often feel like I fit more into the wondering in the wrong path scenario.

I am not saying that all aspects of ones life fit into this thought process, but I have found that unresolved things from ones life, even if they have remained hidden for years, surface again in adulthood just like a winding road that leads back to the starting point.

These things, at least for me have been the most difficult to address, especially after so many years. They may not be anything in particular, but under the surface, there are underlying issues that cause your feelings and thoughts to process things a certain way, often feeling misunderstood by many. Left alone on a path not traveled.

That leads me to think about the Serenity Prayer and wonder if for most of my life that has worked in a negative thing for me or others.

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change" ......I know some who don't accept things as they are....they change their course and pull towards a goal. I know some things can not be changed, but I wonder if a lot of things could have been changed if the effort was made to do so.

"courage to change the things I can"......this is interesting to me because I think some, myself included at times do not have the guts to make a change even if the outcome would be for the better. You can not change others, only yourself. But getting past the hurt and pain that others cause, to do so is not as easy as it may sound.

"and the wisdom to know the difference".........that is the key I think. The wisdom part of this is important, along with the ability of letting go of hurts and disappointments that have held us back for most of our lives. Much easier said than done.

This take me back Tuesday, has me thinking about the starting point in my life. I often wonder if it was all detours and wrong ways that brought me to where I am today, or if I followed the planned route. I can think of several things that bring peace in knowing I was exactly where I was supposed to be at that given place in time.

Then, I think of what could have or should have been done differently, and wonder if it was my lacking that brought me to a certain point, or someone else that caused a pileup on the road and caused me to veer off the path for a short amount of time.

I know it is easier to cast the blame else where, but sometimes I wonder.....I tend to let others dictate my own dreams and goals......"the wisdom to know the difference"........to acknowledge, accept, to forget, move forward and get right back on the trail that leads to the horizon. That is the path we all should try and stay on......it will lead each of us to the right place at the right point in time we were meant to be.


  1. I have thought similar things myself sometimes, but never voice them. I always think, Why Not? Why not just change something.....it is possible.

    This was a good post, and not all may agree with you, but remember they are not on the same path and that is ok.

    I love visiting your blog, you inspire and provoke thoughts that a lot of the time are not comfortable to begin with. This post is a good example. No matter what inspired these words, we all feel like this I am sure at some point in our lives. You gave me something to think about for sure.

    Thanks for being real, and not always writing about gushy stuff. Life is not like that, and so many bloggers only tell that side of life. I am not fooled! Jane.

  2. This was so thoughtful and insightful, and will cause many a "hmmmmmmmmmmm" before the day's out.

    We never know which step will take us where on this Great Adventure, and sometimes we're stumbling over what should be stepping stones, but we persevere, and we arrive, we arrive.

    Thank you for all this reflection with my First Cup this morning!


  3. It's like you were speaking straight to me Suzanne. Some hard things going on in the Pyjamas house at the moment and I'm ruminating on some of the things you touched in your post.

    I am wondering whether with some recent events the universe is giving me a big shove to help me take the right path and make the right decision for the next part of my life.

    Like you I tend to let the actions of others often influence my life path and I'm deciding how I insulate myself from that a little more and make decisions that are better for me rather than considering everyones point of view and their needs.

    This post has stimulated a lot of thought for me.

  4. VERY well written, could not have said it better myself.

  5. Suzanne, that is so beautifully written. I think everyone struggles with thoughts about those roads not taken and the ones we did take. And sometimes, we made the changes, but could have made them sooner. I know those old thoughts resurfa...ce in my life on a regular basis. I pray regularly for God's will to be done in my life. And for me to recognize His will when He tells me what it is. Sometimes He has to shout. And, I try to realize that I am who I am because of where I have been. If I had taken different roads, I would be a different person. Maya Angelou was so wise when she said "I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better."

  6. Suzanne I have been doing so much 'looking' at my paths taken and not the last few days that this post is also about me!! As I've cried with sadness and joy over my life I have come to the conclusion that while I have made mistakes I have at least learned from them and kept going. At 60 I have more behind me then in front of me but I hope to make it the best future years I can! Thank you so much for your honesty! In the midst of all the 'perfection' this rings so true for so many. Hugs,Linda

  7. This is getting a little too deep for my shallow mind. It does help to get certain feelings out into the open and share with others.This will be headlines on BlogHer. You need to work on letting things go and get on with your life.

  8. I was just thinking this morning about how times flies and how we react to the low times and good times. Your post really spoke to a lot of what I have been thinking about lately. Thanks

  9. We all go through these insecure thoughts. The trick is to see if there is something you can do to make things different... do it if possible and move on. You can only do what you're physically capable of and what you are mentally willing to do.
    A cat lands on it's feet because of it's
    righting reflex. The cat's righting reflex is it's innate ability to orient itself as it falls in order to land on its feet. The cat doesn't think about all the alternatives. It does this instinctively. It just does what it does.
    Our lives aren't like that. Most of the decisions we make come slowly, not when we are free falling through the air. Sometimes we have sharp turning points and are given big choices but most of the time it's just a slow meander down a path that is comfortable. Then, at some point, we go..." Hey! How did I get here?". We re-evaluate. It's good to do this. It's good to question our lives once in a while. The unexamined life can be boring and sometimes dangerous.
    Make some small changes. See if these changes make you feel better. Sometimes a new hobby, a change of venue, even a new flower in the garden can tranform your doldrums. If not, then look at the bigger picture. Change is difficult and we tend to not want big ones in our life but please remember that you cannot continue to do the same old things and expect inlightenment.
    Please remember that some cats fall from a window and don't land on their feet. There is always the exception. Sometime it's best to keep the window shut and not take chances... not big ones anyway.
    Take care.

  10. Suzanne,
    I also am so touched by this post.....I am going thru a major change in my life....32 years of marriage and boom! Change....hate it, mourn it, feel hopeful, feel nothing. This psot really helps bring it all into perspective.....I am going to copy this post if it is OK with you and put it by my bed, so at night or in the morning I can read this and have a better understanding of how and why things happen....thank you for this Suzanne, really....thank you.

  11. I enjoyed your post, I tend to contemplate on life, more these days.
    You made me think about taking the road and falling over and over again.
    Maybe we are on the wrong road;)


  12. What a thought provoking post, Suzanne. The Serenity Prayer is one that I have gone back to over and over and over again through the years. You are right....it is easy to say but sometime so very difficult to follow . I have a tendency to go back over and over again things I have done in my life, asking WHY I did them, and IF I did the right thing at the right time. In most instances I still do not have that answer. I hope I have traveled down the right road...if not, I am getting a bit old to turn off onto another...but then, there is always time to start over trying to do better.

  13. What a powerful post and just what I needed to hear today. I feel like it was sent just for me.

    All we really can do is hope we have chosen well our paths.

    I will be thinking on this one for a while I am sure. Great writing.

  14. I think we all have these thoughts at one time or another. The one thing that I know for sure is that we cannot change the past. But we do have the opportunity to change the course of the future.

    I have the Serenity Prayer on my bulletin board as a reminder....

  15. Good post Suzanne. I question my path a lot but you know sometimes things do happen for a reason and I prefer to believe that there is a higher power directing our path and that we are not all just stumbling down the path of least resistance.

  16. Suzanne, What a wonderful post, it makes us stop and think, which is a good thing. It seems like we are always in such a hurry. It is nice too reflect back and think of what if.
    What if my first husband had not found some one else after 21 years of marriage. What if we were still together. I am very happily re married for 20 years now. My husband has lung cancer and things have changed a little in our life. I love the serenity prayer and feel where I am now is in God's hands. Very good post my friend. Now I have to get ready for Vintage Things Thursday. Be back soon.


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