Finding your place in this world and being relatively happy where ever that place may be is often not as easy as it should be. My mind has wondered about that very thing over the past few weeks.
As an adult I sometimes question the road that I have traveled to this spot on my road map. I lately often wonder if I missed an important detour or ignored warning signs along the way that would have lead me on a different path. How do you know for sure you are where you were meant to be when so many questions come to mind?
As a child growing into young adulthood we have dreams and hopes. One wrong road leaves us on a trail that most likely we wished we would have never traveled at one point or another. Some folks I know have the capability of recognizing what the wrong move was and move on to greater things via a different route. I seriously know someone who has that unbelievable insight and they never cease to amaze me. They stumble and like a cat, always end up on their feet. It is amazing. It is admirable. On the other hand, there are some that take the wrong path and just continue keeping on keeping on.....never really knowing how to pull onto the right road or make the right decisions to get them to the place they want to be.
These are two extremes I know, but I often wonder where I fit into this scenario because I know I am not one to always land on my feet and often feel like I fit more into the wondering in the wrong path scenario.
I am not saying that all aspects of ones life fit into this thought process, but I have found that unresolved things from ones life, even if they have remained hidden for years, surface again in adulthood just like a winding road that leads back to the starting point.
That leads me to think about the Serenity Prayer and wonder if for most of my life that has worked in a negative thing for me or others.
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change" ......I know some who don't accept things as they are....they change their course and pull towards a goal. I know some things can not be changed, but I wonder if a lot of things could have been changed if the effort was made to do so.
"courage to change the things I can"......this is interesting to me because I think some, myself included at times do not have the guts to make a change even if the outcome would be for the better. You can not change others, only yourself. But getting past the hurt and pain that others cause, to do so is not as easy as it may sound.
"and the wisdom to know the difference".........that is the key I think. The wisdom part of this is important, along with the ability of letting go of hurts and disappointments that have held us back for most of our lives. Much easier said than done.
Then, I think of what could have or should have been done differently, and wonder if it was my lacking that brought me to a certain point, or someone else that caused a pileup on the road and caused me to veer off the path for a short amount of time.
I know it is easier to cast the blame else where, but sometimes I wonder.....I tend to let others dictate my own dreams and goals......"the wisdom to know the difference"........to acknowledge, accept, to forget, move forward and get right back on the trail that leads to the horizon. That is the path we all should try and stay on......it will lead each of us to the right place at the right point in time we were meant to be.