Monday, January 12, 2009

Are you Kidding Me? In America?



.......As this story unfolds, you will understand the title....trust me.

Have you ever known a person who seems to be mad at the world? Not only mad at the world, but who appears to have a distinct dislike for you? For no reason? Have you ever known anyone who seemed to have such a black heart that their physical beauty was non existent? Well, truthfully I can say I have never known anyone who falls into that category........until about five months ago.

To refresh your memory, I was transferred to a different facility with my job in August of 2008. Not only was the move stressful, but working with a large number of people I did not know was stressful as well. The dynamics of the work environment was very different than what I have been used to. The combination of the many different ethnic backgrounds, different work procedures, different management styles made for a very stressful few weeks in the beginning.

One thing I noticed in particular was a women who works in our unit. She is of foreign decent and from day one, she looked at me as if I was Satan's spawn. This women has such a hate for me, it is overwhelming at times. I catch her looking at me as if she could claw my eyes out. At first, I tried to overlook it, and thought maybe I was overreacting and seeing something that was not there. But I am here to tell you over the course of 5 months, no matter how much I'd smile, speak, acknowledge this women, she still had a very distinct dislike for me. It never changed.

Can you imagine speaking to someone, smiling, trying to be friendly day after day to have them look at you with such hate you can feel it radiate off their body? Can you imagine speaking and saying hello to have them abruptly turn and walk away as if the devil himself is sitting on your shoulders?

It is really hard for me to describe the depth of this women's hate, it is so monumental that I really can not put it to paper. In all of my.......... 40-something years, I have never encountered anyone like this women. It was a new experience for me and one that not only made me very uncomfortable but down right angry. After all....what the heck did I do in the first place?

I decided after a few weeks to take notice of her demeanour with other coworkers. She talked to other employees, smiled at other employees, seemed to interact well with other employees....just not me. She had no desire to even act like I existed. All I got out of her was hate filled glances and dirty looks. I was perplexed to say the least.

My conclusion was this person had just a hateful spirit about her and I could not change that. I was not going to waste any more time trying to befriend this women because I could see I was wasting my time. I knew in my heart I had not done one thing to her personally, just showed up for work. Me being there had nothing to do with her, personally. It was her problem not mine. Once I made up my mind to let that go, I did feel better about the situation because I refused to let her personality upset me any longer. However, from time to time, I would catch that hateful look every now and again and each time I said a silent prayer for God to Bless this women who was apparently in such misery.

I have always been a firm believer that anyone with a disposition like that must be a very miserable and unhappy person.......I never dreamed how right that one belief I had would prove to be......to be continued.

28 comments:

  1. Glad to see you began to pray for her---The Bible teaches us to pray for our enemies---you did GOOD !

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  2. Amazing! Patsy's right: prayer is the only answer.

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  3. Oh, it is so hard to pray for those that hurt us sometimes... i admire that in you.

    And you're killing me making me wait for the rest of this story, you know...

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  4. Oh my goodness! To be continued?? LOL That will drive me nuts!! hee

    I know for a fact that treating people nicely when they are mean and cruel to you, pays off. It has for me, for my friends and for my kids. I have always told my girls that if someone is unkind to you, just smile and be polite, then watch their attitude eventually change. It has worked a 100% of the time.

    I'll be patiently?? waiting for your next post! ;D

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  5. Suzanne...you're killing me here! More, I say, more...maybe you reminded her of someone her significent other had dallied with??? More! ♥ Bo

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  6. Okay, you left us hanging. I hope you conftronted her!

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  7. I think one of my ex co-workers has a twin. I agree that mean people are unhappy, but geez, why take it out on us?

    I look forward to reading more.

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  8. What?!?!?!? ..."to be continued"???? ....I thought that only happened in TV land.
    I'll have to make sure and read the last line from now on (to check that I'm not going to be left hanging before I start).

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  9. I had a similar situation happen to me once. I am anxious to hear how this one turns out.
    Judy

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  10. TBC...
    Come on, I want to know what happened!
    I think you are handling it very well.

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  11. I can hardly wait for you to finish this story!

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  12. AHH to be continued, pout. I have always found it challenging and fun to be nice, sometimes overly nice, to people who had a sour disposition. I have found that many times there are things going on in their lives that they just can't get past right then. Over time, they do soften, and believe me they will remember how kind you were, and how rotten they were.

    There have been a few truly evil people, who this treatment does not work on. But the satisfaction of seeing their frustration at not being able to crack your happy core is rewarding in its own.

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  13. Oooo.. that could not have been easy for that long!! Maybe she had hoped this job would go to someone else .... ?? Someone she knew well?? I don't know!
    I would've felt so bad in the end that I wouldn't know what to do....

    Hope your prayers worked!

    Monica

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  14. You did the right thing. Can't wait to hear the rest.

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  15. I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this, but you are taking the only action possible -- pray for her and for yourself. I'll pray for you too. I'll be anxious to hear what happens. laurie

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  16. Pray works wonders doesn't it. I'm glad your faith stepped in.
    hugs ~lynne~

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  17. Pray works wonders doesn't it. I'm glad your faith stepped in.
    hugs ~lynne~

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  18. Some people are just miserable like that and there is no changing them. I agree the only thing you can do is pray for her and kill her with kindness!

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  19. I wonder what her problem is/was.....did you displace her in a position that maybe she was up for or she felt entitled too? Maybe she didn't have a vendetta against you personally, just the situation...I can't wait to hear how this turns our. ~ Robyn

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  20. she sounds exactly like my sister in law! I finally decided that her hate was jealousy...and one day talking to another sister in law (HER SISTER) it was revealed that my assumption was correct!
    to this day...it is the same thing every time we meet...she plays nice until we are alone in a room...and I could swear her head spins all the way around!

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  21. Ack! I want to read the rest of the story.
    I am hanging.

    :-)

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  22. I cannot think of anything beyond prayer that can help such a hateful situation. As a person who is always nice and always has a smile for everyone I cannot even begin to understand how someone could be like this. How awful for you. Praying for you.
    Roberta Anne

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  23. BEEN THERE......DONE THAT......
    Geessh, SOME people...Let GO and Give it to GOd was the BEST thing to do! ANXIOUSLY WAITING for the next Chapter of this ordeal!

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  24. Great post....just checking in to get caught up!!!!!!!

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  25. Perhaps you remind her of someone and the memory makes her angry and resentful without even realizing it. I've seen this happen before. Right now it seems you've made the right choice but if the situation again begins to rear it's ugly head, which often times happens, you may want to just boldly approach her and ask her 'why me'. It may rectify the situation completely. Good luck in whatever choices you make. It's hard to work amongst someone who gives you such an uncomfortable feeling.

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  26. Suzanne, that just breaks my heart. I wonder if she thinks you did or said something and you actually didn't and there is a great huge manifested misunderstanding that she has???? I pray for you to continue to have strength to find wisdom in this situation. You seem to me like such a sweet thing, I can't imagine anyone feeling that way towards you. As they say you can't please everyone all the time!
    Ugh but it is so exhausting!
    hugs, angie

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  27. Jean, the former co-worker apparently is triplets. I worked with their sister.

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Sometimes someone says something really small, and it's like it fits into this empty space in your heart!

Thank you for stopping by and leaving your thoughts here, they really mean a lot to me!

Suzanne

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